thekiplodocus asked: Hi! I just saw your post on the "Best Dad Ever" thing. I'm not sure how right I am, but when I first saw this image, it was in a positive light - I heard that the original poster's mother was slut-shaming her on her shorts, and her dad cut his jeans to support the poster by matching the poster's shorts. And that's why he was the "Best Dad Ever" - by being supportive.. I'm not sure if I'm right, but is there any chance that this was true? In which case, I don't want the wrong news to get out.
I’m not sure where that story came from, but here’s the post from the family’s blog which is what I read and got upset about:
I really appreciate your interest in getting the right story out there!
Everyone from Time magazine to the Facebook page for the documentary Bully has posted this photo of the so-called “best dad ever”, who put on a pair of short-shorts to “teach his daughter a lesson” about modesty.
Yeah remember when I said a Facebook page DEDICATED TO PROMOTING AN END TO BULLYING posted this photo and praised a dad set on humiliating his daughter out of her shorts?
I don’t want to go into the long long long list of reasons slut-shaming and bullying are no-nos, but I do want to say to this dad and to everyone who supports this kind of parenting: leave the immaturity to the playground bullies.
Teenage girls receive mixed messages from all corners of society: wear the latest styles that bear your midriff and legs so you can be hip, but cross the line and it’s DEAR GOD BE MODEST, LADIES! STOP TEMPTING OUR SONS AND THEIR BONERS!!!!!
Parents are in a unique position of having an opportunity to talk to and educate their children about what is and isn’t appropriate behavior, and it’s fine for some parents to decide that they would rather their kids add a couple inches to the hems of their shorts. What isn’t fine is not having a respectful and open conversation about these values.
By donning a pair of short-shorts in an attempt to mock his own daughter and say “look how stupid and slutty you look”, this “best dad ever” isn’t helping the conversation about over-sexualization or professionalism or any reason he might think his daughter should change the way she dresses. He’s just continuing the same kind of slut-shaming and ridiculing that comes from the bullies he had better hope aren’t hurting his children.
Teens are on the verge of becoming adults and needing to make important decisions for themselves, and without dialogue with trusted adults, independence is going to be a problem. I’m hoping that the majority of parents in the world are moving towards parenting styles where discussion and mutual respect prevail and bullying and shaming are left to children.
mikasalannister asked: I need your advice on something. In my school we have absolutely no sexual education, nobody talks to us about homophobia or anything else like that. I live in South Africa so rape and violence against women, especially LGBT women, are very common.We have a lesson about "values" but we just learn how to be polite etc. Should I talk to my teachers about it and suggest they discuss it in our values class? Thanks :)
ABSOLUTELY! I’m not sure exactly how your school system works, but if you are passionate enough about this issue, go all out! Suggest it politely to the teachers in charge of the “values” lessons, write letters to the administration or school board, and if these don’t work, try to form a club or student group that people can attend to get informed.
I think one of the most important things to do when talking to or writing to your teachers or forming a club is to do your research! Bring in articles and statistics on what issues should be covered and how covering them will help. Try to gather support from other students, teachers, or parents, too.
If you form a club, try to spend time on school outreach. Ask to hold an assembly or to go into classrooms to inform other students about LGBT issues, sexual assault, and sex ed.
I love that you’re bringing this up and I wish you the best of luck. Let me know if you need anything!
Anonymous asked: What are your favorite feminist blogs and/or websites? I'm just getting into all of it and I adore it and I'd love other resources :)
Oh gosh where do I begin? We follow a lot of great people on tumblr, and honestly scrolling through the “feminist” tag or clicking on people we’ve reblogged from might help you out.
I like getting my feminist news from Jezebel (http://jezebel.com) but I back up their stories with other sources since it’s a very opinion-driven site and I don’t always agree with all of their commentators’ points of view.
Other than that, obviously our blog is the best ever and you really can’t go wrong with it, duh